In the previous two posts, I talked about how house churches are different from small groups. My basic premise was that small groups act as supplements to normal church (where individuality and shallowness reign), but ultimately fail to accomplish their intended goal because the overall message sent by the small group conflicts with normal church…a house divided if you will. I then explored some of the strengths of house churches where small groups tend to be weak.
Today, I want to delve into additional characteristics of a house church and what is, perhaps, one of its strongest “selling points.”
Community.
I’ll be honest, I sometimes cringe when I read that word. Community is so hot right now. And while I’m grateful that we’re talking about it, I fear that it is just another fad that will pass just as quickly as it came. If you don’t think so, consider the discovery I made in this press release where I found that of the top 50 Christian Best-Selling books a total of zero were primarily focused on community. It seems that we like the idea of it, but have absolutely no clue what it is or how to create it.
So what is community? What does it look like? How do I know I’ve found it? And how does a house church do it?
Community is Costly
That’s right, it costs us. Unlike small groups where we can participate for our own benefit and get some supplemental feeding, community costs. The reason is simple: in the Kingdom of God, the community of believers is your family. You can no more write them off than you could your own mother. When someone is in need, whether physical, spiritual or emotional, you must help.
Even more, you must make yourself vulnerable to others. Without doing so, intimacy is impossible. For many of us, this is our greatest fear. And that is even truer in the house church, where so many have been burned by traditional church models and, as a result, seek something less traditional. House churches can be breeding grounds for bitter Christians. So, we often hide. We guard our hearts making sure to only give them away when we are 100% sure that the other person can be trusted.
And when we do that, we destroy community.
Like many things in the Kingdom, however, things are upside down. In order to receive love, we must give it away – the more the better. In order to receive life, we must lose it. And in order to create a trusting community, we must trust even when it is dangerous to do so.
Community is Tedious
Along with the buzz about community there comes an unhealthy, unrealistic portrayal of how great it is. And it is great, don’t get me wrong. But with community comes high highs and low lows. Even worse (or better, perhaps), you can only get the highs of community when you spend significant amounts of time in the lows.
The truth is that community is often very boring and uneventful – and when you’re part of a house church, you know that well. If you’re not a part of one, well now you know what you’re in for in case you ever decide to join one.
This isn’t a bad thing, though. Walking with others through the humdrum of everyday life is one of the most fulfilling things you could ever do. In our culture we’re addicted to the exciting momentary thrills and we carry that into our Christian relationships and churches as well. But life lived with others in the midst of crying babies, groceries, school, mowing lawns, and the 9-5 routine is a rare and precious gift.
Community Will Change Your Life
Even though it may be costly and tedious, entering into a community with other believers will change your life like few things can. The change is mostly subtle and hard to explain. It comes slowly and mostly unnoticed until you’ve been at it for a few years. Then, one day, you look back on who you used to be, and who others used to be, and you realize just how much your lives have changed.
Community will make you a more secure person…but only after letting others in on your insecurities.
Community will make you a more loving person…but only after you learn to be loved in the midst of everything about you that is unlovable.
Community will make you a spiritually, emotionally, and physically healthier person…but only after you witness and work through the sickness in yourself and others.
Community will make you more patient…but only after you are forced to wait when you’d rather not.
Community will make you more humble…but only after you see how deep pride runs in your own heart.
Community will make you more thankful…but only after you learn to say “thank you” for everything in your life that you didn’t ask for.
Community will change your life completely…but only after you submit to its humdrum, long-term, costly demands.
What are other characteristics of community?
Participate: When you think about community, what comes to mind?
Engage: Resist the temptation to just talk about community: check out the list of community-focused books on our Resources Page and resolve to read one off the list.
Own: Take some time to evaluate how your participation in a community has changed your life. How are you different today than 1, 5 or 10 years ago? How do you hope you are different in 1, 5, or 10 years from now? What will you do to make it happen?
