A Blog for the Church

#4. You can’t choose your body parts.

I have some body parts that seem to cooperate better than others. My arms and legs still work pretty well. They are even getting stronger as I work on them. My eyes are starting to give out a little. I need a stronger eyeglass prescription each year. If I had my choice I would choose a quicker metabolism and a body that was a little more proportionate (my wife makes fun of my chicken legs). We can’t choose our body parts, but we do our best with what God has given us.

I am convinced that God brings people to us at The Well. We don’t do a lot of marketing. We have this blog and a web site that needs a lot of work. Almost everyone who has ever come to one of our churches has come because of a personal invitation.

When they come they have the option to become relationally invested or they can just visit and never return. There are some who have “visited” for months and then decided they didn’t want to invest.

One of the lessons that I have learned over the years is that whoever comes and decides to stay becomes part of the body. For better or worse they are now part of us. Sometimes they are a blessing and come ready to contribute, invest and work. Sometimes they are the work. But they are part of us, so we do our best to love them.

One of the advantages of house church is that it is a constant exercise in sacrifice. We don’t have affinity groups or group people by demographics. We just welcome whoever comes. We make it clear that they are one of us we wont let them just wander away. In fact we wont let them go without a fight. We wont force anyone to stay part of a group if they are feeling like God is leading them elsewhere or if they just want to leave. But being a body part is a big responsibility. If one is hurt or not functioning well, it is the rest of the body’s job to nurse it back to health.

So, become a part of a house church at your own risk. You have been warned. It is a wonderful thing to be part of a body. But don’t think you can change or control the rest of the body parts. Jesus is the head, not any one person. Delight in the body parts that God has given you. He has blessed you with them. Treat them well.

# 3. Church Doesn’t End

Our church meeting begins at 10:30 am on Sunday morning. It ends when it ends, usually around 1:30, but you never know. Last week it started at 1:30 pm and ended sometime around 6. But it didn’t really end around 6. It never really ends.

Not to be too cliché but we don’t go to church we are the church. It’s not about the meeting; it’s about our lifestyle. This was a pretty big lesson for me.

About a year and a half ago a couple named Jeff and Erica started attending our church. A couple of months later I had a little heart issue and ended up in the hospital for two days. My wife Ali called Jeff and Erica to ask it they could watch our sons while she was with me. They immediately came over. After the end of a long day my wife returned and thanked them for babysitting. They said, “no, thank you for giving us the opportunity.” That made an impression on me.

Jeff and Erica are great examples of church. We can always count on them. Consequently, it makes us want to be available for them. A couple of weeks ago they were on vacation and Jeff texted me to ask if I could go over and take in their trash can. It was a small thing but I not only didn’t mind the inconvenience, I was actually happy that I could help.

If we think that church is one or two hours a week we are missing the point. It’s not about filling your calendar with busy work or feeling guilt about doing more. It’s about being the body of Christ. It’s about the “one-anothers.” The meeting is when we come together and share about what God is doing in our lives. It’s where we encourage and equip each other to return to the front lines. It’s also where we worship, pray and learn together. It’s where we get our marching orders from the Holy Spirit. But Church doesn’t end when we leave the meeting. It never ends.

Number 2. House church is hard.

Yes, some call it “simple church.” And in some regards it is simple. It’s simple to start one, simple to re-locate, it functions simply and it can be spontaneous and fluid. But the difficult part comes in trying to sustain a healthy “simple” church for any period of time.

We have started many house churches over the years. Their life span seems to be anywhere from six months to two years, with a few exceptions. I have had a church in my house since 2005. Even though the address had stayed the same the players have changed.

We have always been called The Well. We have always had a meal at the beginning of our meeting and have always had open sharing and participatory meetings. Also, the church has been truly organic.

I don’t mean “organic” as some are using it these days as a way to label a small group. I mean organic in the sense that it has been a body that has had growing pains.

We have seen birth and death in our church. We have had families and single people come and go. They have left for various reasons. Some have left because they didn’t really “get” what we were trying to do. Some have left to start their own simple church. Some have left because the didn’t “like” someone else in the group. Most of the time people leave with a good feeling about the experience and us but they said they were missing “big” church. I have a hard time believing them. Not that someone couldn’t miss a “big” church. But in the cases of those who I am thinking of, I would say that most of them left for selfish reasons. They just didn’t want to work that hard at it.

I have come to believe that house church only works when people are willing to die to themselves. We come to church wanting to get “our” “needs met.” We come to hear a good sermon and good music and find good programs to be a part of. All of that is about one’s “self.” When you come seeking to bless others, you, in turn are blessed.

I don’t see anywhere in the bible that says church should be fun, or entertaining, or easy. On the contrary, following Jesus is hard, and good. But it is not about you.

Do I love house church? Absolutely. Is it easy? Nope. It stretches me to my limit all the time. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

.There has been a lot of talk at The Well about money and salaries. Who should get paid? Should anyone get paid? Where does the money come from? What are we giving to? The talk of money can bring out the worst in people.

It has been an issue for years. Since we left the building we have had one full time employee, which would be me. Some have been very supportive some have been very critical. Some people have left The Well because I get paid.

I rarely feel bad about being supported for the work that I do. I have thought and prayed a lot about finding some sort of “tent making” job. But I think that decision would be one to appease others rather than doing something that I felt God was leading me toward.

I believe that if more people were committed to the cause of reaching the lost, making disciples and planting churches and less concerned with protecting our assets we could have made great strides by now.

My good friend John White has written an interesting article on Financing Apostles It is worth a read and maybe even a comment.

The Well is a network of house churches. It is also a movement. A movement of the Holy Spirit and a church planting movement. Everyone who is part of the Well is either a strategist, catalyst or an activist, or at least they should be.

We are part of a cause that says we can meet anywhere, anytime and do anything, as long as it is doing that work that Jesus sent us to do. Our cause is Jesus. Our methods are simple. We meet in Jesus’ name and do his work.

I found this guest post by David Broodryk from South Africa on David Watson’s blog. He talks about the roles of the strategist, catalyst and activist in a movement.

Take some time to think about your role and how you can fulfill it.

Now what?

First know that it is not going to be easy. I never said it would be.

It is time to go deeper, be more sacrificial, more missional and more intentional. You are not content just sitting in a pew. You have heard plenty of sermons, attended potlucks up the ying yang and brought friends to the “bring a friend Sunday services.” Now it’s time to get serious.

So what will you do after your exodus? Maybe go and meet the neighbors, you know, those people Jesus told you to love. They may be surprised to see you out in the neighborhood on Sunday morning. Or go to a Starbucks and pray for the people around you or go for a bike ride. I don’t know. I don’t think it really matters as long as you are listening to God and not just going to church for the sake of going to church.

Disclaimer: Can you do all of this above without “leaving the building?” Of course you can. You can be part of an “institutional” church and still be missional, intentional, sacrificial, etc. And you can be part of a house church and be extremely self-centered and unloving.

Just be careful. It’s not about the location, it’s about the heart.

I find that relationships tend to go deeper and have better accountability in small churches. This does not mean it is the only way.

As always, I would love to hear your comments as we plough together in the journey. Press on church.

How do we achieve escape velocity?

Last week I explained my version of escape velocity or How to leave a church that is causing more harm than good in your life.

Leaving a church is a very emotional and difficult decision.  You have no doubt made good friends and have a surplus of memories. It is important to examine your heart and motives. I am not suggesting that you leave disgruntled or arrogantly.

So, if you have taken my advice and done a lot of prayer concerning your “escape” and you really believe that this is a move that you should make then go for it. I know, easier said than done.

If you need some moral support, there are plenty of people who have left the traditional church to meet in homes or other “non-conventional” locations. If you would like to contact me or other leaders in the Well network, feel free. We will do our best to give you whatever support we can.

Here are some steps you may want to incorporate:

Skip a Sunday. Just make that Sunday productive. Be intentional about visiting neighbors, inviting someone to breakfast, etc. It will feel weird if you have been going to church your whole life. So, What will you do? You could:

Take this opportunity to invite some neighbors over for breakfast.

Take a prayer walk around the neighborhood and see what happens.

Or there are about 25 other things I could think of doing after leaving the building.

Pray about giving. One of the things that people often do when they leave the building is they stop giving. But the opposite should be true. Now you have an incredible opportunity to give wherever God leads you. Pray about the possibilities. They are endless.

Find or start a house church. Why leave one church just to find another one? The goal is not to isolate yourself from other believers but to be more intentional about “being” the church.

Talk to pastor and leaders. This is not to be offensive. You may even ask them for prayer and support as you begin your journey. Maybe you can creatively brainstorm about how you can be a missionary to your community. You don’t want to burn bridges. You are trying to follow the Holy Spirit.

Talk to your friends and explain to them why you are leaving. This is not to plan a coup, but an opportunity to share about the journey that you are on. Talk to people in person. Don’t write a letter or an email.

Whatever you do, don’t use this as a gripe session or a time to slander church leaders. Most church leaders are completely committed to the call of God and are doing their best teach, lead and evangelize. You can make this a time to affirm leaders and other believers. However, God is taking many people on a new path. If you are one of those people, then there is no need to apologize. Embrace what God is doing.

Leave the Building. Pick an escape date and just do it. Don’t look back. No guilt or regret.

Now comes the fun part. What will you do after you have made this epic move?

Stay tuned.

1. Visit the elderly
2. Volunteer at a soup kitchen
3. Buy someone a cup of coffee (in Jesus’ name) at Starbucks
4. Mow a neighbor’s lawn
5. Pray all morning
6. Take a long walk with God
7. Have family devotions over breakfast
8. Start a church
9. Have a garage sale and give the money to a good cause.
10. Read the Bible
11. Write a blog about not going to church
12. Pray for missionaries
13. Run a 5k, tell people about why you aren’t in church.
14. Worship God
15. Feed the homeless
16. Pray for local churches
17. Give stuff away
18. Invite the neighbors over
19. Have a block party
20. Tell a stranger the “good news.”
21. Write letters of encouragement to pastors in third world countries
22. Take bibles to everyone on your street
23. Read The Rabbit and the Elephant by Tony and Felicity Dale
24. Start a neighborhood backyard Bible club
25. Find all of the references to “church” in the New Testament